~~ So This Is Christmas ~~

Christmas eve 2009,
sittin here thinking about everyone i love so much , the few friends i have and all the family, thinking about how much i love them all so much , thinking about the people that are having a rough christmas this year due to financial situations, thinking that our situation could be so much worse , and being so gratefull for all i do have! thankfull i have my dad with me this year, just thankfull for everyone!! things are different this year of course, My Tiff is with child, and her and he man will be here for christmas which is great! but this will be the first year in almost 22 year i wont have my mom here!! she has decided to stay home this year , which bothers me terrible!! The best gift i recieved this year will be getting news on Dec15th that my dad now has a clean bill of health!! his cancer is now gone!! what more could a girl ask for , i have my kids my parents, my sister, and my husband for christmas! Christmas gets me every year for getting emotional!! the music, the lights, i wish i could of helped someone out this year for christmas like i did last year! the feeling i have after i help someone this time of the year is amazing!! and i cant this year! :0( maybe next year!! but this year im going to be happy just to have all my family and friends!!! i have learnt that gifts are nice, but not everything!! i honestly wouldnt of cared if i got one gift this year! God has given me my dads health!! thats all i need!! anyhow im off for now to have some eggnog, and listen to some christmas music!! Merry Christmas & and happy new year!! see you in 2010!! lets hope its better than 2009!!lolol

Change is hard!!!!!!!!!

Well last night Tasha and i went and got our Christmas tree!!
This was the first year in over 22 years that my dad didnt take us to get our tree! it was very hard !! my christmas spirit just isnt here this year! i hate change! my dad is sick ! as i watched as other familes walked around the tree lot looking at trees my heart sank! i know i have plenty to be grateful for but i just miss my dad and the way things use to be! anyhow Tash and i found a nice tree!! we kinda down sized from our usual trees but it is a nice treee! this year is going to be different all the way around! 2 weeks til christmas and i have yet to get my shopping done, no cards done up , and im just feeling blah! if anything this year will be about the true meaning of christmas i know, just having my family will be my christmas! not the shopping , not the giving gifts, or recieving gifts! it will be about having the ones we love with us! next year will be better i know!! anyhow im off to work ! i shall return soon!