Its been a while since my last venting session .. since my last post my Daughter and Granddaughter have come home, which has been wonderful!! I love that little Girl as if she were my own!!And i love having both my girls here in the same city!!Im still jobless!lol but i must say the summer has been nice! But im off tomorrow for a job interview !! im bored stiff sitting home and feel completely useless!! On another note My feelings and emotions on LIFE are all over the place! i have days where i just sit and think all day about the what if's! such as ...What if something were to happen to me? or someone in my family! i have been worrying on a daily basis lately about the strangest of things!!I have been worrying alot about what people think of me? and i have been worrying alot about trying to fix relationships with people that i really dont get along with anymore! Because if something were to happen to me, i wouldn't want things to of been unresolved!Life is just to short! I tend to wonder if maybe im going through the CHANGE? hard to say i guess!! but i have just been really feeling like a DEEP kinda person!!lol My Daughter has moved into my Nan Henderson s House, and Well that whole experience of cleaning the place and getting it ready for Tiff , really took its toll on me!! I found it extremely hard! My Nan is still alive, and to go through her house as if she was gone was very hard! As well as being hard on my Dad! Lately i have been having a hard time with feelings about my Dad as well!Sometimes dad can be a little hard, and of course at those times im being a little soft maybe! But i do have feelings! and sometimes i dont think my dad knows that!!Sometimes his words can be harsh,as well as his reactions to things. And even though im 38 years old . i still feel like a little girl when he scolds me or talks down to me! and my feelings get hurt!And for me to try to explain this to him would be a waste of time, only because he wouldn't take me serious! or he would say i was being a whoosh! and maybe i am!! I cant help the way i feel about things and i wont make excuses for my feelings or emotions! this is me!! and well this is me saying goodnight for now !! i shall return again soon!!
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